Yup, it’s become a theme. I now know the answer that hid behind so many eyes in my youth: “Why do old people say time moves continually faster?”
Because it does.
Here we are at Sept 1, and my friend & I haven’t fulfilled our goal stated near the end of July: “We’ll chat in August.” Friends – those people you love dearly, connect with rarely, and understand/forgive anyway. I’m about 3 birthday dinners behind with another friend, 2 days away from the next birthday season (which I’m not ready for), and 3 crafts behind on Christmas ’24.
But this is an update post – so we’ll get to an ‘up’ note: Aunt ‘Neen has a one-and-done plan for the littles for Christmas ’25. (And I’m kind of excited about it.) The littles’ birthdays? Um, no clue, and they’re both in September. I’ve got a plan for Dad’s, also September, and it will also be shared with Christmas. After all, what does an 81 year old twin of Tim ‘the toolman’ Taylor need, except help & shop time?
Frankly, his daughter could use a bit more shop time…but I have Wednesdays, and more friends than I can adequately love on, so we’re good…just a bit behind the 8-ball (and the 4, and the 9, and…).
Mine isn’t exactly a question of unclaimed minutes – it’s more a matter of fragmentation. Collections of minutes, such as 10-5 on work days, belong to the store, doctor, church, etc. All others are vulnerable to multi-tasking. At the moment, I’m writing this article on a phone app from the family room while keeping half an eye on a sleeping parent. (Who, by the way, goes from tortoise to jackrabbit in 1.7 seconds.)
My fingers on a real keyboard can get much more done than a stylus on a handheld, but that entails set up & tear down. You see, things out of place affect Mom like a snagged fingernail. Nothing else can happen until it’s dealt with. Thus, my office & sewing studio are in my bedroom. I do have (and cherish) sew-in Wednesdays. Fabric, focus, & friends – what could be better? Other than Bible study at the Deaf church with more friends (on Wednesdays).
There’s also a bit of whiplash, moms get it, of being involved in one thing and suddenly yanked by priority into something else with the pace dictated by another human. Just like the majority of family caregivers, I’m older than a young vigorous mom. My roller coaster riding days, while fun, are behind me…except metaphorically. But I’m not alone – generations of people have raised kids & protected elders. It’s my turn, and as promised, God is with me.
I can tell, because neither bitterness nor insanity have overtaken me, and some really cool people still call me friend & appreciate my humor. (It’s my coping mechanism.)
Speaking of which, I recently went to a Deaf retreat in MI. Turns out it’s been going on for 34 years – I wish I’d known long ago! Anyway, the registrar flipped my ornery switch a week before, and we kept up the banter all weekend. It was a much needed refreshment and I learned new games. Yes, the rest of the fellowship and the messages mattered. They were on faith – I have notes. As for ministry I brought to the environment, sometimes it’s ministry just to be one more person who tells someone they’re not invisible.
In a couple of weeks I’ll go to northern IN for another Deaf event & some time with beloved friends. Totally looking forward to it. This group, in many ways, removed my invisibility.
By the way, September is the month for the annual Deaf Kids Connect Virtual 5K. It’s a fundraiser for a ministry dedicated to making families of Deaf kids less invisible, and making Jesus visible to them. Participants have all month to move 3.1 miles, by walking, running, swimming, hiking, or all of the above. See their webpage for more.
Last month I mentioned some health stuff. The treadmill test was cut short. My heart rate changed enough to rule out a pacemaker, but as it went up, my blood pressure went down. The cardiologist made a medicine adjustment & said that as long as my ankles aren’t swelling & stairs aren’t a problem, we’re good. I’m at the low end of normal, a tad overweight, and at retirement age. Next check in April.
Jesus’ comment about trying to save your life and actually losing it, though it means what it says, has also had another application as of late. Like Martha, we can scurry around with all the health & beauty regimens, tests, and consultations to the neglect of the one higher priority. A sandwich & time together is what Jesus sought from His friends. Mary got it.
Martha’s intent was lovely, but it caused her to miss a much better offer. (Guilty as charged.) I prefer relaxed hospitality, where the focus can be on the friendship, not the expectations. I also prefer my healthcare and home maintenance that way. I’m not quite healthy enough to do all I wish, like a Prov 31 all-in-one-day kinda way, but I can handle what needs to be handled with a bit of ministry & leisure thrown in. The house wouldn’t pass a white glove test, but the Hoarders production crew isn’t knocking on the door. That’ll do.
Folks are status-quo. Dad has senior coffee every week with a couple of well-retired guys (at 81, Dad’s the youngest). One of them enjoys jigsaw puzzles with his wife then passes them along, so Dad & I have plenty of winter entertainment lined up. Mom now sleeps about 70% of the time. Much of her waking time is full of frustration for her, so sleep is ok.
That brings us up to Sept 1, lead-in to Fall with school, birthdays, Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and another year. Already.
Why do old folks say time moves fast? Because it does. Enjoy your friends, now’s the time.